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Nothing they can throw at us that we can’t handle. We were both fighting for our lives before we got here, remember?
[ he takes it at face value, even though he’s fully aware plenty could go wrong. he’s half expecting sephiroth to appear at any given moment now. ]
…Hmph. [ the equivalent to an “i guess”. ] Maybe… the people you knew didn’t do right by you, then.
[ he takes it at face value, even though he’s fully aware plenty could go wrong. he’s half expecting sephiroth to appear at any given moment now. ]
…Hmph. [ the equivalent to an “i guess”. ] Maybe… the people you knew didn’t do right by you, then.
...Well, I can't argue that. It's been nice being able to shower and have actual full meals.
[The suggestion makes Daan stiffen slightly. That couldn't be right, Elise was just... bold and cunning. It wasn't wrong, just different. Surely, that...
The stories he would tell about his early life with his parents would endlessly amuse her, and he would chase for that attention. Marina and Cloud were nothing but gentle with him, though, and that confuses him, it comforts him, that couldn't be right.]
It's not as if I can ever ask them now, anyway.
[The suggestion makes Daan stiffen slightly. That couldn't be right, Elise was just... bold and cunning. It wasn't wrong, just different. Surely, that...
It's not as if I can ever ask them now, anyway.
Edited (too many wells aghshkfh) 2024-02-08 01:21 (UTC)
That's one word for it.
[ he says it in that deadpan cadence, hardly emoting -- but he trusts that she knows him well enough to detect when he's simply being himself.
in reality, he can't remember -- what SOLDIER taught him beyond the basics of combat. he remembers the barracks, the constant uphill marches and a rifle in his hands, but not much else.
why was there a rifle to begin with?
cloud shakes the feeling of gun metal, cold and hard, off. in any case, he's almost finished with his bowl of noodles. ]
Girls... [ he remarks, contemplative. ] Friends or...?
[ a beat. "something else?" is implied in the silence. ]
...Not much. [ that's a lie, but he says it coolly no less. ] Turns out not... everyone here is a lost cause.
[ and then he swallows. ]
There's... a guy, actually. And he's-- ...a good person. [ there's fondness softening those words, even if he feigns an attempt at repressing it. ] Don't see that often these days. Turns out he's a doctor, so... if you need anything, just tell him you know me, alright?
[ he says it in that deadpan cadence, hardly emoting -- but he trusts that she knows him well enough to detect when he's simply being himself.
in reality, he can't remember -- what SOLDIER taught him beyond the basics of combat. he remembers the barracks, the constant uphill marches and a rifle in his hands, but not much else.
why was there a rifle to begin with?
cloud shakes the feeling of gun metal, cold and hard, off. in any case, he's almost finished with his bowl of noodles. ]
Girls... [ he remarks, contemplative. ] Friends or...?
[ a beat. "something else?" is implied in the silence. ]
...Not much. [ that's a lie, but he says it coolly no less. ] Turns out not... everyone here is a lost cause.
[ and then he swallows. ]
There's... a guy, actually. And he's-- ...a good person. [ there's fondness softening those words, even if he feigns an attempt at repressing it. ] Don't see that often these days. Turns out he's a doctor, so... if you need anything, just tell him you know me, alright?
[ this girl. he can never get a read on her. they stride down the hallway, and he purses his lips, features hard and seemingly constipated. ]
Yeah, but what were you carving? [ a sigh. ] This have to do with those Gods Daan told me about?
[ not that he knew a lot, but he knew just enough to gauge that their world was... remarkably fucked up. ]
Need to be more careful, by the way. They could seriously get your ass next time.
Yeah, but what were you carving? [ a sigh. ] This have to do with those Gods Daan told me about?
[ not that he knew a lot, but he knew just enough to gauge that their world was... remarkably fucked up. ]
Need to be more careful, by the way. They could seriously get your ass next time.
Weird to not be fighting. My body isn't used to not moving so much.
[ he notes it; the way's body goes more rigid, taut with tension. he must have said the wrong thing. reluctantly, he reaches out to brush his fingers against his shoulder. ]
...You alright?
[ he notes it; the way's body goes more rigid, taut with tension. he must have said the wrong thing. reluctantly, he reaches out to brush his fingers against his shoulder. ]
...You alright?
That so? I don't miss it, personally. But I wasn't some super soldier like you. Suppose we'll just have to keep you occupied.
[The touch earns a glance, then Daan offers a faint smile.]
...I'll be fine.
Anyway. We should get some things we've picked out, hm? [Daan leans in, gently kissing his cheek.] I can let you get dressed.
[The touch earns a glance, then Daan offers a faint smile.]
...I'll be fine.
Anyway. We should get some things we've picked out, hm? [Daan leans in, gently kissing his cheek.] I can let you get dressed.
Good luck. [ followed by a scoff. ] Maybe I'll get into knitting or something.
[ the kiss to his cheek makes him dissolve; how could touches this simple, this gentle, render him into putty every time without fail. ]
You... [ a sigh, before he admits: ] really have no idea what you do to me, huh.
[ the kiss to his cheek makes him dissolve; how could touches this simple, this gentle, render him into putty every time without fail. ]
You... [ a sigh, before he admits: ] really have no idea what you do to me, huh.
Now that I'd like to see. I'm sure someone around here can teach you how to knit a scarf, huh?
[Though Daan starts to stand up, he hesitates briefly after that's said. He turns his head slightly toward the door.]
Oh, I think I have some clue.
[How couldn't he by now? And it's not as if Daan's any better. If he was a good or decent man, he'd have done something about this by now. Instead, it drags along, until either all of his underbelly is exposed or the clutches of a wicked cat sinks his claws into Daan.]
...I'll be waiting out here for you. Take your time.
[Though Daan starts to stand up, he hesitates briefly after that's said. He turns his head slightly toward the door.]
Oh, I think I have some clue.
[How couldn't he by now? And it's not as if Daan's any better. If he was a good or decent man, he'd have done something about this by now. Instead, it drags along, until either all of his underbelly is exposed or the clutches of a wicked cat sinks his claws into Daan.]
...I'll be waiting out here for you. Take your time.
[ he doesn’t know want to make of that. daan leaves and cloud swims through his thoughts, sinking in his own insecurity. was it a rejection? or an affirmation that he felt the same way? was he humoring him — doing this all out of pity?
cloud emerges, clad in his outfit from before. the corset and panties are draped over his arm. a hand grasps at daan’s shoulder, grip a tad stronger than usual, beckoning his attention. ]
…Hey. [ his voice is firm, low. ] …Did you…want to see each other again?
[ or did he fumble this? ]
cloud emerges, clad in his outfit from before. the corset and panties are draped over his arm. a hand grasps at daan’s shoulder, grip a tad stronger than usual, beckoning his attention. ]
…Hey. [ his voice is firm, low. ] …Did you…want to see each other again?
[ or did he fumble this? ]
[The question genuinely surprises him; Daan had thought he was being fairly polite, though if perhaps restrained. The grip is also strong, perhaps telling that Cloud is worried or upset.
Daan reaches up, placing is hand over Cloud's.]
I do. [That's the problem, isn't it? He does want to see Cloud again; he likes their time together, when he shouldn't.]
I didn't mean to imply otherwise.
Daan reaches up, placing is hand over Cloud's.]
I do. [That's the problem, isn't it? He does want to see Cloud again; he likes their time together, when he shouldn't.]
I didn't mean to imply otherwise.
Sure does, hotstuff. I'm an occultist. I've studied those Gods all my life. [she always found them fascinating. Knowing what others don't, the hidden parts of the world around them, it's too tantalizing for Marina to simply ignore. Even if it wasn't expected of her as a daughter of the Dark Priest, she still wanted to study what she count on the subject.]
And oh? Are you offering to watch my back next time?
[that is not what Cloud is offering, but she can shove some words in his mouth to see if he chews on the idea]
And oh? Are you offering to watch my back next time?
[that is not what Cloud is offering, but she can shove some words in his mouth to see if he chews on the idea]
Guess I just…
[ this wasn’t the time to be having this conversation. he knows this. they both know this. he doesn’t want to ask the million dollar question outright, the “what are we?” — if they were having sex and leaving it at that, it’d be one thing. but the hand holding, the kisses, these dates; not even he’s stupid enough to deny what’s going on. ]
…Don’t want to mess things up.
[ it’s already too late for that. whatever happens from here and onward won’t phase out easily. maybe that’s what terrifies him, too. ]
[ this wasn’t the time to be having this conversation. he knows this. they both know this. he doesn’t want to ask the million dollar question outright, the “what are we?” — if they were having sex and leaving it at that, it’d be one thing. but the hand holding, the kisses, these dates; not even he’s stupid enough to deny what’s going on. ]
…Don’t want to mess things up.
[ it’s already too late for that. whatever happens from here and onward won’t phase out easily. maybe that’s what terrifies him, too. ]
Edited 2024-02-08 18:20 (UTC)
Cloud...
[He knows. It would've been one thing if this was more casual, or if Daan had been smart about keeping Cloud at arm's length. However, that's not how it's turned out; he sees the parts that fascinate him, that make him feel cared for. Safe, in some respects. Did he ever feel actually safe in the von Dutch estate?
There are too many things he is questioning now. He shouldn't, he can't. This would be almost easier if the fucking cat would just come in with his sickeningly sweet voice and offer his rotten deal.]
...We're human. We will make mistakes. Hell, I've got plenty I've made.
Just don't be a dick about it and we can work it out.
[He knows. It would've been one thing if this was more casual, or if Daan had been smart about keeping Cloud at arm's length. However, that's not how it's turned out; he sees the parts that fascinate him, that make him feel cared for. Safe, in some respects. Did he ever feel actually safe in the von Dutch estate?
There are too many things he is questioning now. He shouldn't, he can't. This would be almost easier if the fucking cat would just come in with his sickeningly sweet voice and offer his rotten deal.]
...We're human. We will make mistakes. Hell, I've got plenty I've made.
Just don't be a dick about it and we can work it out.
You make it sound so easy.
[ he doesn’t believe it is — not entirely. but he’s fond of that part of daan, too; the way he manages to make it all seem so simple, even when they know it isn’t. ]
…Fine. [ he resigns in that characteristically bratty little way. ] You sure you’re okay? You don’t need me to go back to your place with you?
[ he doesn’t believe it is — not entirely. but he’s fond of that part of daan, too; the way he manages to make it all seem so simple, even when they know it isn’t. ]
…Fine. [ he resigns in that characteristically bratty little way. ] You sure you’re okay? You don’t need me to go back to your place with you?
No need to overcomplicate things, right?
[It's already complicated, though. It's been complicated and it will only get more complicated. When is ever a good time to put an end to it for Cloud's own good? Hell if he knows.
Gently, he squeezes Cloud's hand.]
Well, you don't need to, but you're welcome to come along.
[It's already complicated, though. It's been complicated and it will only get more complicated. When is ever a good time to put an end to it for Cloud's own good? Hell if he knows.
Gently, he squeezes Cloud's hand.]
Well, you don't need to, but you're welcome to come along.
Mm.
[ neither of them are saying what they’re really thinking, and he’s aware of that on some level. it’s fine. they didn’t need to talk about it. he could have this for now — just be content with what daan’s giving him. ignore that selfish impulse that’s telling him he wants more.
his head pivots up, the rush of warmth to his hand returning him to reality. and then he squeezes his hand back with some shyness. ]
Your place, huh. We could… do something. [ a beat before he corrects himself– ] Not sex, I mean. [ uh. ] Just… hang around. Do what people do.
[ neither of them are saying what they’re really thinking, and he’s aware of that on some level. it’s fine. they didn’t need to talk about it. he could have this for now — just be content with what daan’s giving him. ignore that selfish impulse that’s telling him he wants more.
his head pivots up, the rush of warmth to his hand returning him to reality. and then he squeezes his hand back with some shyness. ]
Your place, huh. We could… do something. [ a beat before he corrects himself– ] Not sex, I mean. [ uh. ] Just… hang around. Do what people do.
Edited 2024-02-08 21:21 (UTC)
[It feels cruel, letting it hang in the air like this. If he was better -- more disciplined, smarter, a good man -- he'd have done it. But he holds on, gathering what bit of enjoyment he can afford before it slips through his fingers like sand.
Right now, he lets his hand settle in Cloud's.]
Sure. We can do that.
Don't really have much there, but I can at least fix us a drink or something.
Right now, he lets his hand settle in Cloud's.]
Sure. We can do that.
Don't really have much there, but I can at least fix us a drink or something.
[hey what the fuck
That genuinely catches him off guard; he still isn't used to being flustered about this kind of thing, but he does feel heat creeping up onto his face. How the hell did Cloud accidentally get to be smooth for like one second?
Clearing his throat, Daan glances away.]
...Well. Sounds like that will work, then. Wonderful.
[Anyway! Daan will just get their various lingerie and call that a day.]
That genuinely catches him off guard; he still isn't used to being flustered about this kind of thing, but he does feel heat creeping up onto his face. How the hell did Cloud accidentally get to be smooth for like one second?
Clearing his throat, Daan glances away.]
...Well. Sounds like that will work, then. Wonderful.
[Anyway! Daan will just get their various lingerie and call that a day.]
[ She shakes her head, twirling her noodles around the bowl. ]
Just friends. I'm not playing the game.
[ But she's a little pink, because she definitely...kissed two different girls. One naked. And she doesn't know if that means she likes girls? She didn't dislike it.
She's saved having to keep thinking about it because Cloud is actually talking.
And her stomach flips at the same time her heart swells. She's so glad he's making friends. She was worried. But...
She thinks again, maybe he turned her down because he likes men. That hurts less than just somehow not being the right girl for him. If that's the case, though, maybe she doesn't have to be quite so careful about some things.
She reaches across the table, putting her hand over his and squeezing it lightly, and she doesn't have to force her smile. Even if there's a little bit of sadness around the edges. ]
I'm really happy for you Cloud. It wasn't easy for either of us, back in Midgar. If there's good that comes from this place, then I think we should both embrace it. And maybe try not to need a doctor, okay?
Just friends. I'm not playing the game.
[ But she's a little pink, because she definitely...kissed two different girls. One naked. And she doesn't know if that means she likes girls? She didn't dislike it.
She's saved having to keep thinking about it because Cloud is actually talking.
And her stomach flips at the same time her heart swells. She's so glad he's making friends. She was worried. But...
She thinks again, maybe he turned her down because he likes men. That hurts less than just somehow not being the right girl for him. If that's the case, though, maybe she doesn't have to be quite so careful about some things.
She reaches across the table, putting her hand over his and squeezing it lightly, and she doesn't have to force her smile. Even if there's a little bit of sadness around the edges. ]
I'm really happy for you Cloud. It wasn't easy for either of us, back in Midgar. If there's good that comes from this place, then I think we should both embrace it. And maybe try not to need a doctor, okay?
Hotstuff? [ he blurts out as if he were doing a spittake. the gall on this woman. he doesn't know whether to be impressed or offended. ]
...That mean you got magic? Or is yours different from, uh, his?
[ you know, he won't say it outright-- but you can hear it in his tone, the allusion to Mr. Sylvian Sex Magician.
then she says that and-- cloud scoffs, head turning away. ]
...Not like I have a choice. He'd throw a fit if I let anything happen to you.
[ that is a yes, by the way. ]
Consider it on the house for now. I don't come cheap.
...That mean you got magic? Or is yours different from, uh, his?
[ you know, he won't say it outright-- but you can hear it in his tone, the allusion to Mr. Sylvian Sex Magician.
then she says that and-- cloud scoffs, head turning away. ]
...Not like I have a choice. He'd throw a fit if I let anything happen to you.
[ that is a yes, by the way. ]
Consider it on the house for now. I don't come cheap.
[ her grin is-- beautiful. he hasn't seen anything reminiscent of it since they were kids, and it takes him back, far, far back, to better days, to simpler times. their childhood is labyrinthine, distorted in one too many ways, but he still remembers it: those few times she smiled at him.
then she compliments him, and his cheeks color, just slightly; there's something different about this. these weren't platitudes. there was nothing here to distract them or take them away from one another's company. this was the present, the here and now, just the two of them.
it's overwhelming, really. but exhilarating all the same. his chest tightens and-- he remembers that night, where she had asked him to be her first. he wonders if she still feels that way. ]
Not as nice as you. [ he says so simply, in one of those moments where he summons an effortless kind of charm born from boldness. he means it, too.
the waitress arrives.
"would the lovely couple like some champagne on the house?" she asks, voice lilted with delight. ]
...Yeah. [ a beat. cloud clears his throat. ] Thanks.
[ they couldn't afford these luxuries in their lifetimes. why not take them now? cloud rifles through one of the menus they've been offered. ]
...Get whatever you want. Seriously. [ he knows it sounds weird coming out of his mouth, but... ] ...Not like we've ever gotten to do this before. Let's have our fun while we can.
[ "fun" and "cloud" are not often compatible; but he's trying for her. trying with what he's learned here, a boy trying to grow into the shoes of a man. ]
then she compliments him, and his cheeks color, just slightly; there's something different about this. these weren't platitudes. there was nothing here to distract them or take them away from one another's company. this was the present, the here and now, just the two of them.
it's overwhelming, really. but exhilarating all the same. his chest tightens and-- he remembers that night, where she had asked him to be her first. he wonders if she still feels that way. ]
Not as nice as you. [ he says so simply, in one of those moments where he summons an effortless kind of charm born from boldness. he means it, too.
the waitress arrives.
"would the lovely couple like some champagne on the house?" she asks, voice lilted with delight. ]
...Yeah. [ a beat. cloud clears his throat. ] Thanks.
[ they couldn't afford these luxuries in their lifetimes. why not take them now? cloud rifles through one of the menus they've been offered. ]
...Get whatever you want. Seriously. [ he knows it sounds weird coming out of his mouth, but... ] ...Not like we've ever gotten to do this before. Let's have our fun while we can.
[ "fun" and "cloud" are not often compatible; but he's trying for her. trying with what he's learned here, a boy trying to grow into the shoes of a man. ]
[Hotstuff is cute! And flattering. Better than her calling Daan "patches" or "wet cat" or just "old man", like she does.]
My magic is very different. I can do a few things, but the only things I've gotten to use around here is a pyromancy trick. Oh, and I helped Pinocchio blow a door off its hinges, hee hee.
[Hurting is a much more intense spell than a bit of fire, but she's mostly keeping that to herself. Best people don't really know what hit them, on that one.]
I'll be fair to you! Favor for favor, if I do need you. I don't like owing people... and it would make Daan happy. You know, in the kind of way Daan can be happy. That sourpuss.
My magic is very different. I can do a few things, but the only things I've gotten to use around here is a pyromancy trick. Oh, and I helped Pinocchio blow a door off its hinges, hee hee.
[Hurting is a much more intense spell than a bit of fire, but she's mostly keeping that to herself. Best people don't really know what hit them, on that one.]
I'll be fair to you! Favor for favor, if I do need you. I don't like owing people... and it would make Daan happy. You know, in the kind of way Daan can be happy. That sourpuss.
...Tifa.
[ his eyes flicker up to look at her -- he should be...relieved that she doesn't want to play. that she isn't thinking of other people. but, despite everything, despite that horribly jealous and insecure nature of his, the part of him that's worried for her wins out. ]
I... [ he thinks back -- on what reno said. the words have burrowed into his brain, knocking back against his skull. ] I think... we're gonna have to. Whether we like it or not.
[ he hates talking about this. it takes him back to that first night they had together: a nightmare, a dream, the reality that they're faced with. that was the first lesson they had learned here: this game would spare no one.
but even that aside, he can't shake the thought: the idea that they have to go back home. that things are only going to get worse. he can't tell her that. so cloud swallows thickly, eyes roaming, darting away as he sets his fork down. ]
I... [ he starts -- and then he stops. ] Never mind. Just... be careful, okay? It doesn't...
It doesn't... have to be like that night.
[ he's such a fucking idiot. this was supposed to be a good time, and here he is ruining it. and then she's squeezing his hand, and he realizes the implication of what she's saying, startling and flushing and looking away. ]
He and I-- We aren't like that. [ the shame that bubbles to the surface isn't because he's a man, no. it's because this shouldn't be happening at all. ] He's been nice to me, that's all. I just-- I don't know. I didn't think anyone here would be worth talking to aside from you.
[ his eyes flicker up to look at her -- he should be...relieved that she doesn't want to play. that she isn't thinking of other people. but, despite everything, despite that horribly jealous and insecure nature of his, the part of him that's worried for her wins out. ]
I... [ he thinks back -- on what reno said. the words have burrowed into his brain, knocking back against his skull. ] I think... we're gonna have to. Whether we like it or not.
[ he hates talking about this. it takes him back to that first night they had together: a nightmare, a dream, the reality that they're faced with. that was the first lesson they had learned here: this game would spare no one.
but even that aside, he can't shake the thought: the idea that they have to go back home. that things are only going to get worse. he can't tell her that. so cloud swallows thickly, eyes roaming, darting away as he sets his fork down. ]
I... [ he starts -- and then he stops. ] Never mind. Just... be careful, okay? It doesn't...
It doesn't... have to be like that night.
[ he's such a fucking idiot. this was supposed to be a good time, and here he is ruining it. and then she's squeezing his hand, and he realizes the implication of what she's saying, startling and flushing and looking away. ]
He and I-- We aren't like that. [ the shame that bubbles to the surface isn't because he's a man, no. it's because this shouldn't be happening at all. ] He's been nice to me, that's all. I just-- I don't know. I didn't think anyone here would be worth talking to aside from you.
[ She flushes, even as she meets his gaze brightly. Ever since they were kids, she's always felt like when he looks at her, he's seeing her, not whatever confusing mix of expectation and fantasy everyone else seems to end up putting on her.
And he's never disappointed when she's her. It makes her chest swell, and she wishes she could tell him what that means to her. The feeling is only stronger now, that even like this, especially like this, that's still how it feels.
He really wanted to go on a date with her. Not just the pretty girl from the bar, or the pretty girl their age. She wasn't sure Cloud even thought she was pretty, and honestly, she didn't need to.
Except when he compliments her, she's turning even redder, dipping her head down in an embarrassed laugh. Okay, she did care if he thought she was pretty. Her hand brushes briefly on his thigh, before she wonders if that's too much and withdraws it to accept a menu.
Cloud...orders. She glances at him, her face wavering for a moment. She hasn't seen anything too off since they got here, though she's been with him less. Maybe....maybe being here has been good for him.
This time when he says that, she puts her hand more firmly on his knee, closing the tiny gap between their thighs. Her heart is pounding, but this feels important.
She knows what it is to feel like she's missed her chance, and anything could happen. To either of them. And-- ]
I'm glad we're getting this chance, even if this isn't how we ever could have expected to.
[ I like you. It's...redundant. A childish urge to just label what she feels then cover her face and wait to be accepted or rejected. It doesn't quite make it to her tongue, but it doesn't make it to her face.
She has absolutely no idea what she's doing. But -- if he's here, she can figure it out. ]
And he's never disappointed when she's her. It makes her chest swell, and she wishes she could tell him what that means to her. The feeling is only stronger now, that even like this, especially like this, that's still how it feels.
He really wanted to go on a date with her. Not just the pretty girl from the bar, or the pretty girl their age. She wasn't sure Cloud even thought she was pretty, and honestly, she didn't need to.
Except when he compliments her, she's turning even redder, dipping her head down in an embarrassed laugh. Okay, she did care if he thought she was pretty. Her hand brushes briefly on his thigh, before she wonders if that's too much and withdraws it to accept a menu.
Cloud...orders. She glances at him, her face wavering for a moment. She hasn't seen anything too off since they got here, though she's been with him less. Maybe....maybe being here has been good for him.
This time when he says that, she puts her hand more firmly on his knee, closing the tiny gap between their thighs. Her heart is pounding, but this feels important.
She knows what it is to feel like she's missed her chance, and anything could happen. To either of them. And-- ]
I'm glad we're getting this chance, even if this isn't how we ever could have expected to.
[ I like you. It's...redundant. A childish urge to just label what she feels then cover her face and wait to be accepted or rejected. It doesn't quite make it to her tongue, but it doesn't make it to her face.
She has absolutely no idea what she's doing. But -- if he's here, she can figure it out. ]
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