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guess i should be flattered. didn't realize was your type.
[ he's deflecting. probably. ]
that your way of saying you'll stalk me?
[ it's a shitty attempt at a joke, don't mind him. another minute passes. ]
feel like a dinner date wouldn't do much for you. you got any bright ideas as to what we should do?
[ he's deflecting. probably. ]
that your way of saying you'll stalk me?
[ it's a shitty attempt at a joke, don't mind him. another minute passes. ]
feel like a dinner date wouldn't do much for you. you got any bright ideas as to what we should do?
[ the question takes him aback-- even moreso does the intent. it's a moment of clarity, where daan's investment in this woman makes picture perfect sense to him.
he hadn't been wrong to compare her to aerith. the similarities are striking. cloud looks to her, electric blues blinking, shifting about awkwardly before submitting. ]
...Her name's Tifa. [ there's a kind of shyness that softens his expression when he speaks. ] She... could use more friends. 'Specially girls.
[ he doesn't elaborate on that last bit; cloud's gaze flits back to marina, and for a moment, there's a flicker of a smile. ]
You're softer than you let on, y'know. You and Daan got that in common. Just can't help but give a damn about people, can't you?
he hadn't been wrong to compare her to aerith. the similarities are striking. cloud looks to her, electric blues blinking, shifting about awkwardly before submitting. ]
...Her name's Tifa. [ there's a kind of shyness that softens his expression when he speaks. ] She... could use more friends. 'Specially girls.
[ he doesn't elaborate on that last bit; cloud's gaze flits back to marina, and for a moment, there's a flicker of a smile. ]
You're softer than you let on, y'know. You and Daan got that in common. Just can't help but give a damn about people, can't you?
...Can't say she'd be wrong. You're a smart guy-- ...with a good heart.
[ that miserable, pathetic little crush he had on him from the onset is manifesting again. not that it's faded; on the contrary, it's deepened into something... far beyond his grasp by this point. but he's learned to be less of a fool about it. the kiss is soothing, a salve to his skin. ]
Catch, huh? [ a smile, small and brisk, plays along his lips. ] She'd be real surprised by that one. Would've thanked you for taking care of me... or something like that.
[ and then-- he looks away, jaw tensing, eyes elsewhere. ]
...You would've been part of the family. I... I can promise you that much.
[ that miserable, pathetic little crush he had on him from the onset is manifesting again. not that it's faded; on the contrary, it's deepened into something... far beyond his grasp by this point. but he's learned to be less of a fool about it. the kiss is soothing, a salve to his skin. ]
Catch, huh? [ a smile, small and brisk, plays along his lips. ] She'd be real surprised by that one. Would've thanked you for taking care of me... or something like that.
[ and then-- he looks away, jaw tensing, eyes elsewhere. ]
...You would've been part of the family. I... I can promise you that much.
Edited 2024-02-28 05:37 (UTC)
I want you to know that I'm going to do my very best to not disagree with you out loud.
[Even though he still struggles to see it. To see himself so positively. Smart, kind, good. But he doesn't vocalize it more.
The mention of family earns a stunned look, Daan's eye trailing down to their hands. The expression he wears is bashful now, less confident, but not in a bad way. Really, he just hadn't expected that kind of declaration.]
...I would've been happy with that.
[Ultimately, it's always what he wanted. To be loved, to have a family. Only... it'd be something truly special in this imaginary scenario with Cloud and his mother.And he never really felt like he belonged in the von Dutch manor. Because he didn't, he knew that, and the cat knew it too. Who could say he'd belong anywhere?]
[Even though he still struggles to see it. To see himself so positively. Smart, kind, good. But he doesn't vocalize it more.
The mention of family earns a stunned look, Daan's eye trailing down to their hands. The expression he wears is bashful now, less confident, but not in a bad way. Really, he just hadn't expected that kind of declaration.]
...I would've been happy with that.
[Ultimately, it's always what he wanted. To be loved, to have a family. Only... it'd be something truly special in this imaginary scenario with Cloud and his mother.
Don’t like that you’re thinking it. At least if you say it aloud, I can fight you on it.
[ geez. he wants to flick him on the head sometimes. but more importantly, cloud notices that momentary bashfulness, fingers delicately wrapping around daan’s with a squeeze.
it’s stupid, thinking about this life that’ll never happen. he can’t help it regardless. ]
You deserve to be.
[ his eyes flicker up. ]
Even if you don’t think so… I do.
[ geez. he wants to flick him on the head sometimes. but more importantly, cloud notices that momentary bashfulness, fingers delicately wrapping around daan’s with a squeeze.
it’s stupid, thinking about this life that’ll never happen. he can’t help it regardless. ]
You deserve to be.
[ his eyes flicker up. ]
Even if you don’t think so… I do.
Hey, I'm at least acknowledging it. That's gotta count for something.
[There's a moment of quiet from Daan. It's still hard to digest the idea, that he deserves anything so good. But he knows that Cloud and Marina certainly seem to think so, and he cares deeply for the both of them.
That's what matters, so much.
His hand returns the squeeze, and he looks at Cloud hesitantly.]
Thank you.
...May I kiss you? [A question so usually asked by Cloud.]
[There's a moment of quiet from Daan. It's still hard to digest the idea, that he deserves anything so good. But he knows that Cloud and Marina certainly seem to think so, and he cares deeply for the both of them.
That's what matters, so much.
His hand returns the squeeze, and he looks at Cloud hesitantly.]
Thank you.
...May I kiss you? [A question so usually asked by Cloud.]
I’ll take it. For now.
[ cloud’s features ease into something gentler, something lighter at his question. he could answer but — it would be easier to lean up and kiss him himself. so he does, lips finding his, hand gripping daan’s. ]
…I know the circumstances aren’t the best… [ a beat. ] But this past week… I don’t regret it. Spending time with you like this…
[ waking up together. going to bed together. seeing each other everyday. it’s been…
it’s been nice. ]
[ cloud’s features ease into something gentler, something lighter at his question. he could answer but — it would be easier to lean up and kiss him himself. so he does, lips finding his, hand gripping daan’s. ]
…I know the circumstances aren’t the best… [ a beat. ] But this past week… I don’t regret it. Spending time with you like this…
[ waking up together. going to bed together. seeing each other everyday. it’s been…
it’s been nice. ]
[Getting a response by simply being kissed is more than enough. It's a simple little gesture, but it does more to move his heart than any amount of sex. Faintly, he smiles to himself, rubbing his thumb over Cloud's knuckles.]
Granted, I do wish the reason you came to stay with me was better, but I feel the same. ...I can't remember the last time I slept so soundly.
[Especially next to someone. Quietly, Daan had worried that maybe he was too physically clingy, holding onto Cloud for most if not all of the night; it's something Elise would remark about.
But it doesn't seem to be the case at all with Cloud. It's a relief, which is a strange realization but no less truthful.]
You can... keep staying. For as long as you want to.
Granted, I do wish the reason you came to stay with me was better, but I feel the same. ...I can't remember the last time I slept so soundly.
[Especially next to someone. Quietly, Daan had worried that maybe he was too physically clingy, holding onto Cloud for most if not all of the night; it's something Elise would remark about.
But it doesn't seem to be the case at all with Cloud. It's a relief, which is a strange realization but no less truthful.]
You can... keep staying. For as long as you want to.
...
[ he falls back into silence -- he's never spent so long in mundanity with someone. nothing to distract him, no goalpost towards survival, no looming fate. just the company of another person, an ordinary life, day to day conversation about nothing and everything at once. ]
Daan, I--
[ he knows what he wants to say in the depths of his heart, but it hasn't reached the confines of his mind yet. so it's trapped in his throat, and he swallows it back down -- before his hands latch onto daan's waist and he pulls him into his lap, selfishly. ]
I know it's weird, but it's... it's hard to imagine life without you now.
[ he falls back into silence -- he's never spent so long in mundanity with someone. nothing to distract him, no goalpost towards survival, no looming fate. just the company of another person, an ordinary life, day to day conversation about nothing and everything at once. ]
Daan, I--
[ he knows what he wants to say in the depths of his heart, but it hasn't reached the confines of his mind yet. so it's trapped in his throat, and he swallows it back down -- before his hands latch onto daan's waist and he pulls him into his lap, selfishly. ]
I know it's weird, but it's... it's hard to imagine life without you now.
Cloud...
[The sheer strength from Cloud shouldn't surprise him by this point, but sometimes it does catch him off guard. Not that he minds; there's some kind of security in another person's strength that gives him comfort, and Daan settles into his lap.
The confession -- as it is, more or less -- does make him hesitate. It's not as if Daan doesn't know. He's known for awhile now, even if there are very large parts left unsaid. A part of his chest clenches, twists, mostly out of fear. Fear for his own future, for Cloud's well-being. They've played that song and dance already more than a few times, especially when Daan reacted so poorly to waking up with a ring on his hand.
Daan places a hand to the of Cloud's neck, thumb tracing over skin. To be this important to someone, that too is something he's always yearned for.Why was it so different with Elise?]
...Would you really take me back with you?
[The sheer strength from Cloud shouldn't surprise him by this point, but sometimes it does catch him off guard. Not that he minds; there's some kind of security in another person's strength that gives him comfort, and Daan settles into his lap.
The confession -- as it is, more or less -- does make him hesitate. It's not as if Daan doesn't know. He's known for awhile now, even if there are very large parts left unsaid. A part of his chest clenches, twists, mostly out of fear. Fear for his own future, for Cloud's well-being. They've played that song and dance already more than a few times, especially when Daan reacted so poorly to waking up with a ring on his hand.
Daan places a hand to the of Cloud's neck, thumb tracing over skin. To be this important to someone, that too is something he's always yearned for.
...Would you really take me back with you?
[ without any hesitation: ]
I would.
[ said firmly, rigidly, lacking in any uncertainty. there's so much he doesn't know -- about himself, his life, his wants. but this, he does. a hand cups daan's jawline, fingers sweeping across his cheek. ]
You're out of your mind if you think I'm letting you rot back home. I'm not leaving you there. Over my dead body.
I would.
[ said firmly, rigidly, lacking in any uncertainty. there's so much he doesn't know -- about himself, his life, his wants. but this, he does. a hand cups daan's jawline, fingers sweeping across his cheek. ]
You're out of your mind if you think I'm letting you rot back home. I'm not leaving you there. Over my dead body.
[Lightly, he bumps his forehead against Cloud's.]
...I don't have anything left there anyway. Or anyone. Marina doesn't want to go back either. So, really, going home with you would only be a win for me.
[Which means Daan has even less reason to go back.]
Winning this game might be the only other way I find out what happened to Elise. Is... that okay?
...I don't have anything left there anyway. Or anyone. Marina doesn't want to go back either. So, really, going home with you would only be a win for me.
[Which means Daan has even less reason to go back.]
Winning this game might be the only other way I find out what happened to Elise. Is... that okay?
[Morning of this disaster.]
Hotstuff!!
Did you help me out with something last night?
I can't remember anything at all. What happened?
Woke up married. Gross. :<
(Whatever it was, I might have let Daan know you were involved.)
(On accident! My bad!!)
(He's so annoying.)
Hotstuff!!
Did you help me out with something last night?
I can't remember anything at all. What happened?
Woke up married. Gross. :<
(Whatever it was, I might have let Daan know you were involved.)
(On accident! My bad!!)
(He's so annoying.)
A lot is wrong, especially if you're asking about Goro.
[there's just so much fucked up about this one boy and Marina just cannot leave him alone]
If you're just talking about last night than we can't remember.
Totally blacked out. Zzzz.
We're trying to put together why we woke up married in one of the wedding suites.
And no, it's wasn't the hotel staff. Seems like we chose this.
Real mystery on our hands.
[there's just so much fucked up about this one boy and Marina just cannot leave him alone]
If you're just talking about last night than we can't remember.
Totally blacked out. Zzzz.
We're trying to put together why we woke up married in one of the wedding suites.
And no, it's wasn't the hotel staff. Seems like we chose this.
Real mystery on our hands.
[ Oh, now he's curious. Buuuuut he's going to hold onto that particular nugget for the time being— ]
I wouldn't have to if you weren't so difficult to find in the first place. I took a LOA to try as much but I didn't have any luck before my time was up.
[ At least he got in a couple good rounds of Fort Condor in the meantime? And he'd even gone and made a new friend, even if she was an odd one. ]
Weren't you picking the place to avoid my stupid ideas?
I wouldn't have to if you weren't so difficult to find in the first place. I took a LOA to try as much but I didn't have any luck before my time was up.
[ At least he got in a couple good rounds of Fort Condor in the meantime? And he'd even gone and made a new friend, even if she was an odd one. ]
Weren't you picking the place to avoid my stupid ideas?
…Even if there’s nothing for you back there, you’ve got me now. And Marina. I’m not letting anything happen to either of you.
[ his wife — right. it’s understandable that she’d be at the forefront of his mind. features grave and attentive, cloud nods his head, hands set against daan’s waist. ]
…Yeah. You don’t… have to ask me for permission, you know. You’re your own person — and she… she’s important to you.
…Listen. If you need help then just… just let me know, alright?
[ his wife — right. it’s understandable that she’d be at the forefront of his mind. features grave and attentive, cloud nods his head, hands set against daan’s waist. ]
…Yeah. You don’t… have to ask me for permission, you know. You’re your own person — and she… she’s important to you.
…Listen. If you need help then just… just let me know, alright?
Thank you, Cloud.
[Is this what it's like? Being told that he'd be taken care of, that he would be protected. When after his entire life he's spent it trying to survive, to take care of himself, to have something to live for.
Maybe this is just a taste of it -- but that's also why he's utterly failed at letting go of Marina or Cloud. Never mind the fact that both of them are stubborn, but now that he's had it, he doesn't want to imagine what it's like without it. Daan isn't certain he can deal with that ever again.]
Maybe I don't need to have your permission, but... I wanted to be clear on my intention. No bullshit, right?
But I'll try to be better about asking for your help. I know I haven't been fantastic about that.
[Is this what it's like? Being told that he'd be taken care of, that he would be protected. When after his entire life he's spent it trying to survive, to take care of himself, to have something to live for.
Maybe this is just a taste of it -- but that's also why he's utterly failed at letting go of Marina or Cloud. Never mind the fact that both of them are stubborn, but now that he's had it, he doesn't want to imagine what it's like without it. Daan isn't certain he can deal with that ever again.]
Maybe I don't need to have your permission, but... I wanted to be clear on my intention. No bullshit, right?
But I'll try to be better about asking for your help. I know I haven't been fantastic about that.
[ “wanted to be clear on my intention—“ sits at the back of his head, lingering. this sounded like…
no, that couldn’t be. they weren’t— this was just a temporary arrangement. he remembers daan’s reaction when they gotten married quite distinctly. this wasn’t that kind of relationship, it wasn’t a long standing commitment—
then why in the world does it feel like one? and why… is he happy that it does?
cloud’s gaze entangles with his. he pulls him closer. ]
Just stay with me. That’s all I need from you.
no, that couldn’t be. they weren’t— this was just a temporary arrangement. he remembers daan’s reaction when they gotten married quite distinctly. this wasn’t that kind of relationship, it wasn’t a long standing commitment—
then why in the world does it feel like one? and why… is he happy that it does?
cloud’s gaze entangles with his. he pulls him closer. ]
Just stay with me. That’s all I need from you.
[Arms encircle Cloud's shoulders, Daan brushing his lips against the other's forehead.]
Wish granted. I'm afraid to say at this point that you're rather stuck with me.
[Daan knows. Not just Cloud's feelings, but his own -- how deep he had gotten, how deeper still it goes and will probably keep going.
Eventually, it will be a matter they both have to face. For now, though, this is enough. It's damn well near enough the stir happiness in his heart when he had only known grief and sorrow for so damned long.]
Wish granted. I'm afraid to say at this point that you're rather stuck with me.
[Daan knows. Not just Cloud's feelings, but his own -- how deep he had gotten, how deeper still it goes and will probably keep going.
Eventually, it will be a matter they both have to face. For now, though, this is enough. It's damn well near enough the stir happiness in his heart when he had only known grief and sorrow for so damned long.]
Good. Wouldn’t have it any other way.
[ his hands slide down daan’s back, possessive and greedy. it isn’t long before his lips are against daan’s, kissing him in slow and measured motions, chest pressed to his. he feels it — the rhythm of his heartbeat, melodious and sweet. ]
Wanna see how stuck you can get?
[ his hands slide down daan’s back, possessive and greedy. it isn’t long before his lips are against daan’s, kissing him in slow and measured motions, chest pressed to his. he feels it — the rhythm of his heartbeat, melodious and sweet. ]
Wanna see how stuck you can get?
[A hand cups the back of Cloud's head, gently scratching through spikes and against his scalp. He leans into the kiss, smiling slightly against him; it's slow, and gentle, nothing quick and fierce. Daan enjoys both, but the former feels so rare until recently.
He'll let himself chase after it.
Cloud's invitation earns a brief little laugh from Daan. It's short, but genuine.]
How could I turn you down wit a line like that?
He'll let himself chase after it.
Cloud's invitation earns a brief little laugh from Daan. It's short, but genuine.]
How could I turn you down wit a line like that?
[ well, that stew is undoubtedly going to get cold — but it’s fine.
cloud kisses him again, fingers sneaking beneath the hem of daan’s shirt, gripping him by his hips. his lips brush up his neckline, peppering pecks along his skin, each one warming with affection. ]
…If you’ve got any plans for today, cancel ‘em.
cloud kisses him again, fingers sneaking beneath the hem of daan’s shirt, gripping him by his hips. his lips brush up his neckline, peppering pecks along his skin, each one warming with affection. ]
…If you’ve got any plans for today, cancel ‘em.
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