hall of mirrors

@girthoverlength
45 / male / as long as you're alive / 5♣

My Self-Summary

Hey bitches. I'm Cloud, because when you're with me you'll be sent to heaven. Sexually. No one leaves the girth-man unsatisfied.

I have five wives but they're not satisfying me anymore so I'm looking for some hookups. Don't worry about them. They're dead to me. When we're together it's only you on my mind.

I deal on the side so if you find some coke in my pants, don't take it. My boss will kill me if another one night stand steals the stuff.

My Future Plans

Future plans? Who has time for those? I'm living on the edge. Right now I'm trying to get laid one hundred and thirty times in a week — let me know if you want to be part of my massive body count.

Maybe I'll go to the north. I don't know. That's why I've been drinking pure vodka. Training. If you drink pure vodka you'll become immune to the cold. This is a fact that everyone knows.

My Talents

I have so many talents you wouldn't believe.

I can smoke four cigarettes at one time. I can juggle up to three dogs at once. Sometimes four if dropping them isn't a big deal to you. I can snort coke and drink vodka at the same time and still win a fist-fight. I'm a master of mimicry; you'd think I'm you when I pretend to be you. It's wild.

My schlong is also thick and talented on its own. I don't even do any of the work. It knows how to move on its own.

Favorite Books, Movies, Music, and Food

Books? Read? I don't know how to read. Music is for nerds. And the only thing I wanna eat is pussy.

My Ideal Partner

I have no standards. As long as you're alive and breathing I'm down to clown. I'm looking to bang as many babes as possible, but I'm willing to throw you twos and threes a bone.

Main thing is that you shouldn't fall in love with me. I know it's gonna be hard because I'm a catch but I'm a lone wolf and will never settle down. Love me now and you'll have the memory of me forever to keep you warm when I'm gone.

Height i am very small Body Type a block Smokes every minute Drinks only pure vodka Drugs snort all day every day Sign i dont know i can't read Education i'm very smart Occupation sexy Income nothing! Children hate 'em Pets a dog and a cait Hobbies roleplaying

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